The danger of striving for perfect
Video (0:03:47) recorded by Martin Palethorpe.
Martin talks about the danger of striving for perfect. He has a client, when nothing is ever good enough. The client is always beating himself up, living in the expectation that life and everything in it should be perfect.
"We aren't perfect. I'd like to talk a little bit about the trap that many of us can fall into around expecting, wanting life and everything within it to be perfect.
So, we sort of live within this bubble that we're striving for everything to be great, right? We want more money, and a bigger house, and a better lifestyle because then it would be perfect. And we want to improve on what we're doing so that we can be perfect at it. And some people seem to have this more than others but there's this constant striving to want everything to be just great.
And we have this ability to look at some others and go, "Well, they seem to have it all sorted." We seem to be able to look at them, and with rose-tinted spectacles, and see what they've got or how they act, and always look over and go, "Well, when I've got it sorted like them, then things will be great."
I was with a client yesterday who does this a lot and so if he does something badly, or if he has emotions, or gets frustrated, or angry, he's beating himself up. He's beating himself up like, "It shouldn't be this way. I should have been able to conquer this or deal with this more effectively." And the strive for perfection or the expectation that life and everything within it should be just perfect, is a lost cause that will end up with you more frustrated than helpful.
And I... So, having worked with so many, many clients over the years, what I see is that we're all going up and down. We've all got tough times and great times. We've all got times when we're on fire being brilliant and times when we're not. And so, it's like a roller-coaster. So, the key is not to get frustrated when you're at the bottom of the roller-coaster. Not to beat yourself up over the situation or to be frustrated by it, but to learn to be with things when they're imperfect. To learn to be relaxed, and comfortable, and okay with wherever you're at in life and whatever is going on.
Now, I'm not for one moment suggesting that you accept a mediocre life. And I'm certainly still suggesting that if you want to strive for greatness, to achieve incredible things in your life, then absolutely I am a proponent of that. But what I'm suggesting is that there's a way of going about that that doesn't have to have a huge amount of negative energy attached to it, especially when you don't achieve perfection.
I'm suggesting there's a way of going about achieving great things but with a peace of mind that helps you be more clear, more focused, and more accepting of the ups and downs along the journey."
If you'd like to become more clear, more focused, and more accepting of ups and downs then email us at contactus@be-unbounded.com and chat with us.
